5.20.20

ah.. i only got an hours worth of sleep today... i didnt get to dream!! darn. hopefully i'll be able to sleep earlier tonight! anyway...
i did some driving today and thats typically where i have my most random thoughts. i enjoy driving but it's probably a good thing to have me in the passenger seat as i tend to daydream a lot. do you ever just go on autopilot when youre behind the wheel and realize.. "oh shit. im going 114 mph haha"
i do that a lot... probably a contribution to why i crashed my car my senior year of high school lol!! i also didnt drive with my contacts in!! arent i just a risk taker...
anyway. a random thought that occurred to me as i was driving was the sun. you must of course know that the sun has sunspots! you do know right? of course you do! ur so smart :)
the dark spots we see on the sun's surface.. yes those beauties.. are you aware that these spots are not actually dark at all? they're bright. it is on the sun after all.. very hot.. yes... but it is dimmed by its surroundings that are far brighter than these areas.
this is a surface level thought but i correlated this to uhh.. the feeling of inadequacy,,..
have you ever been a part of a group but felt as if you were lacking in comparison to your peers? it is only a natural feeling.. but! you are a part of that group aren't you? u made it! u r cool! u are a component of a great collection...
i often dealt with this feeling during my good ol dancing days.. but remembering i passed auditions and made it to an exclusive team in the first place.. i should not feel inferior... but it happens
n thats ok! i did not dwell..
what i really wanna just say is that others successes and talents do not outshine urs! we r all on our own paths... hehe :)
hmmm.. it is currently 12:47 pm.. this is all i have to say for now.. until then.. take care ♥♥

will you come back..?